One of the reasons this blog was started was for J and I to have a place to get out of our own head space and simplify all of the big, complicated things going on around us. I attribute our fast friendship and deep closeness to the fact that we met while we were both independently in the midst of a huge transition. We had both left our close knit families, the only city we ever knew, our sweet sisters who we are both lucky enough to share incredible bonds with, jobs, weather patterns…the list goes on. All to start a new adventure complete with an indefinite amount of unknowns. We were brave, scared, sad, excited, homesick, adventurous, curious – together.
I learned this past year that the key to getting through any transition is trusting yourself. When you trust yourself everything that happens, good or bad, seems to have a reason behind it. It might not be – and probably is not – a clear reason, but when you trust yourself you also trust that you’ll figure out the reason someday. And that feeling is very comforting. That trust can actually get you through quite a lot.
That trust gives you permission to try new things without giving it much thought. Your eyes are a lot more open then you even realize. And if something bad happens, or let me rephrase – if something you did not plan for happens, you can take a deep breath and know no matter what you followed your gut as much as you knew how.
The quick sketch above is one I did for a farewell card to send to close family and friends before I moved out to San Francisco in 2011. It’s nothing special, but when I look at it I remember the excitement, the (positive) fear, and the absolute trust I had in my decision to take this big leap into an unknown. Even though my adventure didn’t end up the way I thought it would or should, and even though that was painful, I still look at this little drawing with a lot of pride. I trusted myself enough to know, no matter what happens I’ll be ok and stronger for it all. And I was right. I learned more about myself and my strength in that one year than I have in my 29 years on this planet – and through that, I’ve learned a very valuable lesson. You really truly don’t need to know what happens next. You just need to know you can handle whatever it is.
Now don’t get me wrong – trusting yourself is not easy – and for most of us it really is a life long journey. I still have a lot to learn and I am still filled with a lot of doubt and fear. But it really is an amazing thing when you look back from one phase of your life to another and see how much you’ve grown without realizing it. It is subtle but powerful. Have you ever looked back on something you’ve done and thought, wow… who was that person. I can’t believe I did that. I am stronger than I thought. That’s where trust begins.
What I love about J’s post on her current transition is how positive it is. It’s a scary time – but she’s already pushed herself in ways she never thought she would or could. I can vouch for that because I was with her and saw her do it. So this new phase doesn’t feel as scary as it might for some and I am proud of her. Wherever she ends up…maybe the big apple?!?!…she will own it.